Your Needs & Support To Partner

Your Needs & Support To Partner

You and your partner may have very different experiences following a pregnancy loss. It’s important to communicate and support each other in a way that recognizes each person's depth of experience and unique struggle. While you may have been the one to physically experience the miscarriage, your partner is most likely struggling with their own range of unfamiliar emotions and trying to figure out the best way to help you cope, too. Here are some strategies to support your partner and effectively convey your needs, so you can get through this together.

What your partner may experience
Your partner or supporter may deal with this loss differently from you. Here are some things to keep in mind as you navigate this time together:

They may not feel the same attachment or depth: They did not experience the physical pregnancy and may not feel the same attachment as you — that is totally normal and ok. It doesn't have any implication on the validity of your feelings, or theirs.
They may be more affected than you: They may be as affected or even more affected than you, as this loss may also be the loss of a vision for the future they’ve held for years — that is totally normal.
Their grief may be unacknowledged by others: Your partner’s grief may be overlooked and marginalized. Know that even if their grief is less visible, it’s there.
They may be struggling with feelings of insufficiency: They may feel helpless and guilty that you have to bear the entire physical burden of pregnancy loss.
Open communication is critical: Honest communication about where you are and how you’re feeling is the key to getting through this together.
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